When You're Gone

I came into this relationship, knowing he was going to leave me. In a way, it might be considered self-sabotage, but I honestly think Mike is worth it. A while back I let him know that when he goes away, I will be here waiting for him to return.

We met back in February of this year and I was going through a very hard time in school. My reputation as a nice girl had been tarnished by a few immature boys and a couple of catty girls. I held my frustrations inside as I began to slip away into my own perfect world. Mike made me feel like I was whole again, only if it were for a few minuets. We would meet at Starbucks or Applebee's and talk for hours on end. Every time we talked, I felt like I was learning something that most people don't take time to learn about. I was learning about war and all the aspects of it. Mike would talk about his time in Iraq, Korea and his cadet life at The Citadel. This was all new to me. I had no idea what he was talking about half the time, but I learned and I learned quickly.

Mike gave me support and strength. I was falling and tumbling down as graduation was approaching. Kids can be mean. I was realizing that my life was not changing after graduation. I would be attending community college while all of my friends were heading off to a university. I would be working, going to school, then living at home. I would be stuck in high school mode for another year. I am still trying to cope with these feelings, along with Mike leaving on Sunday for training. He tells me that he can see my sadness on my face everyday. It actually kind of amazes me that he loves me anyways.

I'm not sure how I'm feeling about the future now, specifically this coming year. I will be working close to a full time job along while being a full time student to stay busy. When I have time to myself I will be writing, working out, or playing with my dog. I am working towards getting an apartment close to my school since gas prices are ridiculous. When Mike leaves on Sunday, I will be alone. I will have no one to talk to as far as the military goes. I will have this blog, and any viewers who wish to share their stories.